by Elder Anthony G. Jones
Okay so you have reached a point in your marriage where neither of you are listening to one another. You hate when she does “X” and she can’t stand when you do “Y”. All you do is either not speak to one another or when you do speak the words are cold and hang in the air waiting for life. Sound familiar? So you both are Christians, believers in the word of God, living a sanctified life right? So where is God in the midst of all this? What part is He playing in your marriage? Are you even seeking Him, or at least some form of Christian counseling? Well let’s look at what we are doing and how we can save our marriages.
The world will have you believe that the Christian divorce rate is as high as non-believers, but that may not be necessarily true and some dispute that. What we can not deny is that we live in a world where relationships are tossed to the side when they are not working like we want. So many trade in their partners at the drop of a dime for the newer and better looking model not knowing they are entering a hell that they may never recover from. So what does the bible say? God hates divorce, Malachi 2:14-16 reads, “You ask, ‘Why?’ It is because the LORD is acting as the witness between you and the wife of your youth, because you have broken faith with her, though she is your partner, the wife of your marriage covenant. Has not [the LORD] made them one? In flesh and spirit they are his. And why one? Because he was seeking godly offspring. So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith with the wife of your youth. ‘I hate divorce,’ says the LORD God of Israel, ‘and I hate a man’s covering himself with violence as well as with his garment,’ says the LORD Almighty. So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith.”
Wow, pretty strong words from God! What stands out to me is guard yourself in the spirit. We as Christians get so messed up by letting the devil get a foothold in our lives. Just as God hates divorce the devil hates marriage because it is a type and shadow of Christ and the church. We take advice from our non-Christian friends who don’t have a strong relationship themselves. We listen to all the daytime talks show host and what their definition of marriage is and try to measure ours by worldly standards. God said for us to come out from among them. We should be setting the example not trying to fit in to worldly standards. Reconciliation, restoration and forgiveness are supposed to be identifiers of a true Christian, so we must apply the word of God to every aspect of our lives and that includes marriage. We must set conducive atmospheres for us to hear God on a daily basis. Leave the worship music playing while at work and come home to a peaceful atmosphere. Learn to listen to your spouse, communication is key. Speak to God, pray and listen for Him to answer you. Having been divorced and remarried to the same woman I divorced, I look back at what went wrong. God has given me a second chance. If you have a spouse that loves God then it is your duty to make it work. Proverbs 16:3 sums it all up by saying “Commit to the Lord whatever you do and your plans will succeed.” Grace and Peace.
Elder Anthony G Jones is a husband, father and Worshipper of Tehillah Church Ministries located in Goldsboro, NC, under the Leadership of Bishop Anthony W Slater. Elder Jones believes that there is nothing that can’t be accomplished if you have a relationship with The Father! Elder Jones serves on the senior leadership team at Tehillah and is currently working on a book entitled Flash Point, My Journey Through Spiritual Burnout, which is scheduled for completion in early 2013.
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